It has been 32 days since I have seen my students. 768 hours since I have been on campus. 46,080 minutes since I used my teacher voice. Well, maybe the last one is not true since that seems to sneak out from time to time when my 1-year-old is being naughty.
It is so hard to believe that four short weeks ago I was so excited for a week off. I could not wait for a chance to recharge my batteries and spend time with my 1-year-old son and husband over Spring Break. I usually spend so little time at home that over breaks like this I just want to stay home and not leave the house too much. Spring Break was in the air and I caught it bad!
Oh, how the tables have turned!
Cabin fever has set in, and I am looking for any excuse to leave the house possible. Although, I am trying to do my part with social distancing so that is really more wishful thinking right now. I yearn for the routine of going back to work, teaching my students, seeing my teammates, and working with National Board Candidates in person. Most importantly, I miss my students.
My heart aches for wanting a week off and getting so much more time than that. I feel like I got lost in the hustle and bustle of teaching, and life in general, that I took my students for granted. I was looking forward to reading them my favorite read aloud, Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, and trying to incorporate new instructional strategies and technology to close out the year. I am haunted by the thought that I will not get a chance to have these students in my classroom again. This is something that will stick with me long after COVID-19 has passed. No matter how much hustle and bustle is going on at school or in life, take the time to appreciate your students each day.
Now I cannot help but think, “Am I doing enough for my students right now?” I know that teachers everywhere, myself included, are making the best of distance learning and working hard to keep our students moving forward. I work in a district that is lucky enough to have 1:1 access to Chromebooks, and allowed the students to check their Chromebook out. Is it enough to post activities for my students to complete online? Is it enough to have my students work through the many online learning programs like Espark or Zearn? Is it enough to record myself reading my favorite read aloud to share with my students in FlipGrid? Is it enough to send my students handwritten letters each week so they know that I am thinking about them? I do now know if it will ever be enough, but right now it is all I (and my students) can do.
Usually, at this time of year, I am counting down the days until Summer Break. This year I will count down the number of days until I get to see my students again. Only 112 more to go.
Caitlin Gawlowski
Caitlin was born to be a teacher, although she did not realize that teaching was her calling until she went to college. She has always loved to write, and began college with the mindset of becoming a journalist. Before beginning her freshman year of college, she changed my major to Elementary Education on a whim and has never looked back. She graduated Summa Cum Laude with a Bachelor's degree in Elementary Education from Arizona State University, and won the Outstanding Student Teacher Award during her student teaching experience in the Cave Creek Unified School District. Caitlin spent 9 years in the classroom teaching 1st, 2nd, and 3rd grade. She became a National Board Certified Teacher in 2018, and holds a certificate in Early and Middle Childhood Literacy: Reading/Language Arts. The 2021-2022 school year marks the beginning of her 10th year teaching, where she will be working as an Academic Interventionist, and supporting other National Board candidates on their journey toward National Board certification. If she is lucky enough to have free time, you can find her traveling Arizona with her husband and son, spending time with her friends and family, taking group fitness classes, or enjoying a good book.
Comments 1
It’s amazing how much we can take for granted without even knowing it. I think many teachers are grappling with that same transition from the happy anticipation of Spring Break into the forever sadness of having the remaining year cancelled. These grief feelings are profound and it’s good to say them aloud. I know you know this, but you ARE doing enough. And it’s important to remember how much parents have on their plates at home as well. Kids need down time to process their own feelings and to play. Trust your teacher instincts and also trust that you are doing the right things at this time without tallying up any perceived short-comings. Great honesty in this blog. I enjoyed it!