I have been trying to find my voice my entire life.
Going back to my childhood, I was constantly told that I was too quiet, that I need to speak up or louder; I listened to excuses for my shyness handed out before I even had a chance to speak, or my personal (least) favorite “Why are you sooooooooooo quiet?”. If you did not read that one with the nails on the chalkboard sound effect in the background, go back and try again to get the full effect.
As an adult, I have started to find my voice.
Years ago I found my teacher voice. It is a little louder, and much more authoritative, and the pitch varies depending on which grade level I am currently working with.
Last year, I started to find my “duty” voice. This is similar to my teacher voice, but usually, it is needed in a much louder space, such as outdoor recess or cafeteria duty, so I try to project louder with varying degrees of success. I am still working on this one.
This year, I am discovering my “presenter” voice. What better way to try it out than by diving straight into the deep end of the pool: presenting directly to the Superintendent of the school district advocating for National Board certification? My goal was to gain support from district leadership for National Board Certification and recognize teachers for completing the Pre-Candidacy Class with hours, which had not been recognized for the last four years.
This meeting had been in the works for months and had to be rescheduled twice due to outside factors, so when the big day finally arrived I was more than a little nervous. I was representing the candidate support provider team, which includes myself and another National Board Certified Teacher, and also the potential candidates I could be working with if this meeting was successful. I did not want to let anyone down and mess this up by talking too fast, forgetting my most important points, or (the worst) being too quiet.
The day of the meeting arrives. I walk into the room, and for the first time, I hear myself use a voice I have never heard before. It is confident, but a little shaky (after all, I am presenting to the Superintendent of the school district) and talks at an appropriate pace and volume. I remembered my important points and walked out of there with a clear path for moving forward. I was so happy that it went well, but also excited that I discovered my presenter voice!
I had a follow-up meeting with district leadership about National Board Certification, which seemed to be the last step before marketing for Pre-Candidacy could begin. I hoped that I could access my presenter voice, and be confident, knowledgeable, and engaging. I did not want to come this far, to only come this far; I have so much to do and am only getting started.
I walk into the meeting full of nerves since I am presenting to a district leadership team. I open my presentation, take a deep breath, and hear that same voice again. I remembered my main points, asked the right questions, and gained the support of district leadership. On my way out, I had to stop myself from dancing and was ecstatic that I had found the right voice for this meeting.
Several weeks later, I was working with another coach to prepare a presentation for the teachers at school, and I began to think about my presenter voice. I would need to be louder since I would be presenting to a large group; I would need to get the teacher’s attention after discussions in an appropriate way; I would need to ask the right questions and give an appropriate amount of wait time. The more I thought about it, I began to question what I thought was my presenter voice.
Presenting to the Superintendent and district leadership, I was not doing those things; I did not have to when presenting to a group of 4 people. Instead, I presented important information and spoke from the heart, letting my passion for this work show. I realized that I had not used my presenter voice because it is still developing, but instead I discovered a new voice in this process: my advocacy voice.
Advocating for National Board certification has stretched me in ways I could not have imagined before, but I know it will pay off not only for myself but for the teachers and students in my district. This is part one in a series I will write this year about my work advocating for National Board certification in my district.
I can’t wait to see what happens next.
Caitlin Gawlowski
Caitlin was born to be a teacher, although she did not realize that teaching was her calling until she went to college. She has always loved to write, and began college with the mindset of becoming a journalist. Before beginning her freshman year of college, she changed my major to Elementary Education on a whim and has never looked back. She graduated Summa Cum Laude with a Bachelor's degree in Elementary Education from Arizona State University, and won the Outstanding Student Teacher Award during her student teaching experience in the Cave Creek Unified School District. Caitlin spent 9 years in the classroom teaching 1st, 2nd, and 3rd grade. She became a National Board Certified Teacher in 2018, and holds a certificate in Early and Middle Childhood Literacy: Reading/Language Arts. The 2021-2022 school year marks the beginning of her 10th year teaching, where she will be working as an Academic Interventionist, and supporting other National Board candidates on their journey toward National Board certification. If she is lucky enough to have free time, you can find her traveling Arizona with her husband and son, spending time with her friends and family, taking group fitness classes, or enjoying a good book.